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I was very much disappointed last night. C'est pourquoi - Je l'aime trop je crois - ce n'est bon. Il faut que j'en prier. I am alright[underlined] today. Am very glad. Perhaps that helped to make me nasty last nights. Went early to bed tonight. They all went to town this morning to go to Mr. Snells entertainment tonight. I felt quite envious. - May & Leslie are going to Brisbane on Thursday. Bless!! I'll have a fortnight's ease anyway & I need it now. Letter from H. - dear old fellow. I don't appreciate him half enough I know - May the Lord increase my love for him 30th. Wednesday. M. Took sick last night in town & had to be taken to Mrs. W.'s in a cab. There must be something wrong with her internally. The affair was a failure. Hardly anyone there : It's judgement on him for being so nasty on Sunday & so unsympathetic. Mrs. Farquhar & Miss came up unexpectedly this afternoon. Mrs. stayed here & Miss at W.G's! good enough too: I don't like that girl. The mother is nice. They all went to the Mill after tea. Jim S. was over early & we had a good yarn. Wants my photo! will give me one of his. Wanted me to go over to the mill too. but I cared not to go with that lot. Felt lot better tonight Ernest wanted me to give him his lesson tomorrow instead of this afternoon so felt horrible then I consented he was over this evening playing tennis & hardly spoke to me nor said anything about our ride I got reckless. 31st. Thursday. Saw J. this morning. Told him I couldn't come this afternoon so we arranged for Saturday afternoon. Lovely & quiet without the other two. Mrs. W.G. & Miss T. came over tonight with Jim & Jean. We had some music. Got on all right without M. too. Last day of August. How lovely. But!! 14 long weeks yet. 1st. September Friday. Such a long day as this seemed. This has been a funny week. C'est ce garçon qu'il a. rendu. They were all over again this afternoon playing tennis. M. came home with Mrs. W. & the baby. Going to stay for the Anniversary - so is J. he goes on Tuesday. Mrs. W. & the baby came up this afternoon. 2nd. Saturday. [Along side] Referendum Day voting for Federation Another disappointment. M. told me last night that J. was going to drive them to Sharon this afternoon. The scamp never said a word to me. He was over this morning so I went for him straight. We were over at the Hall after practising his song to sing tomorrow night - he asked me then to go out tomorrow[underlined] afternoon. Of course [?scorited} that - then asked if Monday would suit so I said yes! We all went to Workman's this afternoon Kate & I rode down & Jean S. with me coming back. K. & I went earlier than they. I rode Alick's grey. It came on to rain before we got to the Sharon gates so we got off & waited under a tree. It wasn't much. We had a nice little jaunt further on on our own account then when we saw the buggy coming took a short cut over & told them. They were all surprised to see us. Jim was in a hurry to get back & go to town with the other boys after football so we didn't stay long. Mrs. W.G. came after all - said she wasn't - wasn't very amiable to the W's either - doesn't think they are good enough to visit. don't think she was pleased at my riding down & not telling her. She is jealous. 3rd. Sunday. Had lovely quiet time to ourselves M. Mrs. G. & I & the kiddies only. Rob & Dave were back in time for dinner. Anniversary Services today. Over at the Hall this afternoon. Mr. Snell came up with Tom Workman to preside but he was late. "Wasn't pleased atall at being asked to address children. Thought he was coming up to preach" Didn't believe in such meetings being held on Sunday either. He must have been in a bad humour. I quite enjoyed the meeting. The children

sang well I thought. Jim stayed afterwards to practice his song for the night The "Nightless Land." It goes well on the organ (Mrs. John's) At night I waited for Mrs. W. to put the baby to sleep but just as she thought they were both quiet Eric started & the baby too - just as we were going out the gate - so she had to go back. I waited a while but had to go on. J. was waiting for me outside. We got in just as Mr. Snell was commencing his speech. there was very little room. Just after that J. sang. He was nervous - didn't want to sing - but I didn't let him give in & he got through it all right. Was thinking over going out tomorrow & concluded that I wouldn't. He goes on Tuesday & it would take up his last afternoon besides folks might wonder - so - didn't get the chance to speak coming home. Il me laissa et venait au derriere. Je lui dit que je n'allerais pas et lui dirais pourquoi le matin My last anniversary here. - will remember this one too. 4th. Monday. J. was over this morning before school & informed me that he wasn't going to-morrow - not till Friday - & would take me out this afternoon - So I spoke straight out on certain points & we parted serenely. Says he would ask Mrs. W.G. to come too - so I certainly assented - Got Kate's horse for myself. the grey for Mrs. W. & Jim rode Roebuck. It threatened rain so I suggested going to the Falls - wished afterwards I hadn't & let them go Kolan road but as I wasn't exactly fitted up like she was didn't care to slow myself too much. We got on alright till we left the Falls road & struck out for the gate by Kalbar - J. thought evidently that I wasn't to be trusted or that he wanted to get back in a hurry to tennis & Una D. who M. says or thinks he is struck on. However we struck on a new path & landed up at the Mt Perry road certainly - but the gate there was locked -!! we had passed through a mob of wild bullocks before that & jumped the big drain :- altogether we felt not very pleasant at the thought of going back the same way to find the other road - luckily some men were working near who told J. that there was a sliprail in the corner so there was & we got out & rode back to the mill for letters - then down the road to Gobby's - further on. round the corner & up the Barn - there J. & I had a gallop to W.G's place - it was grand. K's horse is a grand horse for riding - as easy as a rocking horse. I enjoyed it muchly - only wished we had gone the other way - only - then - Jim wouldn't have shown himself such a brave cavalier - We went over to Stirling's for the evening after. Had nice evening. Il alla chez elle. Vraiment il semble [?possiat] 5th. Tuesday. Another funny day. Got quite a shock this evening. M. went to town & came home with Mr. G. The news she brought was that dear friend Jack had gone -!!! It came to me just as if someone belonging to me had died. It must have been very sudden - At Killarney too with only her there. I'll never see the dear frllow again now. Dear Jack : he was a true friend too. I'm sure he's safe now. Poor Nellie : I feel terribly for her. What a long dreary life before her. - with five little helpless things left too. [?Jack's] only 31 now - God grant that my own dear one may be spared to me. I feel I've been so horrible & don't deserve his love & This will bring me to my senses. Letter from my dear boy tonight. H's very busy - may not write me on Saturday 6th. Wednesday. Kept on thinking through the night of poor Nellie now Jack is gone. I can't realize it - to think I'll never see his cheery face nor have his warm hand-clasp again. He's another link to the other side. Visitors over at dinner today so as I didn't feel like meeting them nor inclined for any dinner went not home Such a long day is it seemed. Wrote to little Mother this morning telling her about Jack. Got parcel & letter from her this afternoon. She didn't know when she sent it yesterday. Went home & dressed myself then Mrs. Snell & [...] are at Skyring's. Ma was down. They say Edie got out at Annandale when they came down on Sat. Annie T. was there too to meet her

came back & gave Ernest lesson. Evening here tonight for Jim. Didn't feel inclined in the least but tried to be cheerful for Jim's sake & wore my new pink blouse in honour of him. Told him so & he waxed complimentary can't see the least "goneness" on his part - In fact he kept with me all evening & we had a real good time - sang his best songs & I gave him hints this will be our last practice together I suppose. The others played cards. Wonder when we'll have another. 7th. Thursday. They were all over playing tennis this afternoon. J. told M. he wanted me to come over this evening & have a song with me for the last time So we went there for 1/2 an hr. He sang "The Message" my favourite - the last time I'll hear the dear fellow sing for dear know when. He seemed off - so was I - We had a walk over to the Office after to wait for Mrs. G. We two had a real good old talk together. I was very glad. Il m'apella "F." J'en fut etonné - The première foir. I feel very pleased to have such a true friend as he has proved. - Hope I may be made a blessing in a small way to him. I shall miss him very much. Didn't like to say anything about the photo before them & forgot it when we were alone. Told him he reminded me of H. 8th. Friday. J. was over saying 'Good-bye.' I reminded him of his photo he hasn't got them yet. He didn't ask me again for mine. Must sent it when he gets back - that is - if he writes. Shall wait for a month to see if he does. I owe him a letter. Feel a bit relieved all the same that he has gone. All the better for me. What makes me so 'folle' 9th. Saturday. Had a busy day at home. Did all sorts of things. Better busy. M. & I had an afternoon to ourselves - & a game of tennis after tea. She goes to Sydney in a fortnight with Jean S. for a month. It will be lonely when she goes. Mrs. G. asked me this morning when it[underlined] was going to be. I told her I thought this time next year. She thought it would be this Xmas. M. says Kate is going to the Grammar School next year. Don't know whether I'll stay for the others or no. Yet it will be better perhaps to do with less pay & be settled till Easter than be worrying myself & other people over getting a fresh place. Girls in town - took Eric home. 10th. Sunday. Not out all day. Don't feel dressed enough among all this finery M's [?buy] up. Last night we went over to the Mail expecting him. M. was waxing wroth should he not appear & only Tunly made his appearance. She was dreadfully disappointed - I consoled her as I has no letter. H. said in his last not to be surprised if he didn't write but all the same I felt bad. However after we got home (je pensa beaucoup de La promenade derrier Jendi) who should turn up but the recreant Arthur after all M's wrathful denouncings. So she was happy. Looked over all my letters this morning. burnt Bob G's latest. don't like them - they all went out tonight not sincere. Felt sentimental today. 11th. Monday. Wrote to H. Before I did was passing through M's room & Mrs. W.G. was there. She started to expatiate on Jim S's admiration for me. She had informed him one day at her place when Mrs. W. was there "after he had been extolling Miss P. till she was tired & informed him that she rather believed he had a sneaking regard for me & I for him & Jeanne W. had [?coniked] behind him yes" She also (Mrs. W) had told her that I was a flirt which she could well believe & that I had a little way. somehow of getting over the menfolk. Jim S. had thought seriously of me but was too late". that was Alf. W's nonsense I'm sure. I of course afired up over all this & decided flatly that such was the case with either him or me. "Perhaps not with you" quoth she but it was serious with him". M. piped in in assent. It made me feel bad. I had a weep over it. I do hope J. didn't take all they said in earnest. That would account for his altered manner to me. I never noticed anything to confirm that statement of theirs except that one letter he wrote at the beginning of the year - certainly he was more complimentary to me than any of them but I'm sure he only thought of me as a friend or else he hid his disappoint ment if it was so very well. Certainly those songs he sang the first night upset me. I never thought of it before that night. Poor old Jim : I'm very sorry - but it was not to be thought of. Told H. all about it. Asked him if he[underlined] thought me a flirt. I do wish people would not be so silly.

12th. Tuesday. Wrote letter of condolance to Nellie G. Feel quite upset again now - was getting settled before. Letter tonight from H. Dear old chap. He says I most certainly could go out as much as possible to enjoy myself. If I couldn't go out with the best boy take the next best which hit it quite. Jim is[underlined] the next best I believe. He is not the least jealous & trusts me. 13th. Wednesday. Kate's birthday 14th. I wont be here for another one. Perhaps this day next year will be the[underlined] day. Wrote to Ma. Will go down home Sat week. 14th. Thursday. Letter from Ma. Says she saw Nellie G. Monday. Home for few days. - Jack died in his sleep. She was down at Skyrings least week spending days & they were up. 15th. Friday. Another week end thanks be : How slowly they seem to be going. 16th. Saturday. Promised Una D. to go for a ride with her - she sent down this morning for a saddle & skirt & as Kate had ridden to town I had to send her mine & as Ray saw Alf G. was going with her I said I wouldn't go - couldn't anyway no saddle. Did all sort of things at home - Busy all day. Had game of tennis with the girls before tea. Believe I could play a bit with practice. Nearly finished little Hazel's dress. Must next week. Meant to study at school all day but [...] slipped by somehow. M. went to town to Mrs. B. Mrs. G. came home last night with Mr. G. (he from Brisbane) goes down again Monday morning). Mrs. W.G. in Maryboro Felt bit disappointed - thought I was of some importance here but find I'm not much after all. M. says she misses Jean terribly - never misses anyone else. Shows I'm of much account after all! 17th. Sunday. Wrote to M & K. Allanby & Alf. First warm day. Went to church & played. Mr. Snell preached Brought up letter from Ma. enclosing one from S.M. she expects Ma to go back with her when she goes. Must try & get little Mother up here over Sunday while M. is away - would rather then - she fusses so over strangers coming - & then she wouldn't be here to [?interise] my dear little Mammy. she[underlined] would feel easier. Home at night. Feel better now. 18th. Monday. Wrote to H. 19th. Tuesday. Feel nasty again. 20th. Wednesday. - 21st. Thursday. 'Cake & Apron Fair' on here on Saturday. The Mother will just be in it 22nd. Friday. Mrs. B. & the boy up. Going home to-morrow. Feel horrid. [inserted at side] Got Earnest's £1.10.0 23rd. Saturday. Asked Mrs. G. on the quiet this morning about Ma coming up & she said "Certainly & tell her to come & stay as long as she likes". Said nothing to anyone else about it. M. & Jean went down with me too. J. had Jack's photo with her so I shocked them all by kissing it. The train on which Jim was was nearly wrecked on the way to Westwood. Went down town with little Mother. got hat. Feel better today. 24th. Sunday. Went to church. Had quiet day after. Told the Mother what Mrs. G. said so she'll come up next Friday afternoon. Edie expects her up there too (Heidelberg) this Saturday week. 25th. Monday. Up at the usual hour. Got up here much lighter than before - days are lengthening - the engine was down so I had a ride up. 26th. Tuesday. Feel tired today - always do on Tuesdays more than Mondays. 27th. Wednesday. Mr. G. here all this week. I'm real glad Mrs. B is here - [?&] Dinner too, as M. is away. I like Mrs. B more now than I ever did. She's real nice when you get to know her better. 28th. Thursday. Visitors here every day this week : started last Sat. with 3. Glad Mrs. B. is here. Raining some. 29th. Friday. Turned out lovely & fine. Got off earlier this afternoon & went down by the truck to meet little Mother. Mrs. G. & M. went out but told me to make Ma feel quite at home & left word to have afternoon tea ready so I brought her along & we had a nice quiet time till they came

home. It's lovely to have the little mother. She had no idea it was such a pretty place. D. looked quite astonished when he saw her this afternoon. Mrs. B. went home today - 29th. Saturday. Just had nice time this morning, then after dinner I took her out in the truck to the Cedars - It was very nice but coming home was windy & we both arrived back with big headaches. Went home & arranged ourselves again & then went back to the Hall in time for afternoon tea which we enjoyed. I got my goods to the amt. of 10/- viz. wall-pocket - paper bag - two aprons - one muslin 3/- & another holland. & a cheap hat & 1 table so reckoned I did well. It was awfully windy all afternoon. We went out again after tea for a while just to play the duets with Eva. Introducing Ma to lots 1st. October Sunday. Storm came on last night & it turned so cold after. Like a June day today - folks with cloaks on - I went in the truck Ma in the buggy - they had only the little one - Coming back Ma came with me in the truck. Mrs. W.G. & her aunt rode back. Ma & I had a lovely time together this afternoon - we had a walk to the river & stayed home at night. 2nd. Monday. School. Little Mother mended my things & amused herself in general. Went up to W.G.'s to tea & spend the evening. Had nice time. Old lady Stupart took a great fancy to Ma. She's 89 - such a quaint old lady. 3rd. Tuesday. Ma was to have gone down today but they have asked her to stay - till the week's end if she likes - Very kind of them. Maud G. asked her to come up to dinner to-day. Mrs. G. went to town & to stay the night so she was going up - but Archie G. brought word that Mr. Snell would be up with a lady. I blessed Mr. G. telling them to come. He went down too this morning. However I sent Katie home - to do the flowers - & all passed off serenely. The lady - Miss Highfield was very nice & Ma went over the Mill with them - Mr. S seemed very pleased that we were here & was particularly aimiable. D. Ma & I were the only 3 at tea tonight - Strange! D. was most polite : Letter from H. such a sore throat. Went early to bed & had hot mustard foot bath &c. 4th. Wednesday. Throat still very sore : chest too. Must have got thorough cold somehow. Sunday most likely - that sudden change in the weather Didn't get up till after breakfast nor went to school till 1/2-10 : We slept in the first room last night - Ma had been sleeping in my bed. Mrs. G. came home this afternoon : D. sang to Ma tonight. I'm astonished to find him so amicable : he evidently likes her : he talks away to her - far more than he does to me. 5th. Thursday. Horrible to-day. Pains in my back & legs : sick feeling too & tight & sore throat & chest & running at the head : Didn't go down to school till 1/4 to 11. Mr. G. wanted me to stop in this afternoon but I thought I was as well out. This north wind is horrid. Makes me worse 6th. Friday - [insert] Got invite to an "At Home" for Archie's approaching marriage Not out at all today. My chest on the left side is very sore to the touch - never was before - Ma has been rubbing me with hot oil last night & today - believe it's done me good. Felt very bad last night thought of quinsy : was nearly choked : only the rubbing eased me : So glad the Mother is here. She must have been sent here for this purpose. Just got up at 12 - & went into the drawing room & stayed there all afternoon. Mrs. G. went out but we two had a royal time with afternoon tea &c. Am going down home tomorrow. Might see Dr. Francis if I feel no better. Ma gathered all my old things together & put them in the old tin hat box to take down home. Gave girls music lessons here. Ma wrote to Grace telling her to send a telegram to [T...]'s 7th. Saturday. Went down this morning. Feel weak as can be. We got a cab & drove home. I just sat in the bed room all day & did nothing Wrote a scrawl to H. my fingers would hardly hold the pen properly. Feel so funny as if my nerves were all gone wrong. Must have had influenza.