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lesson there. Saw the back-door open thought perhaps Jim had come. Ma went over to see He had. We had tea late. My sister came & I spent a more miserable evening. My head on one side ached fearfully. & I had made up my mind to be fair & square & find out things which I did though il me fit du mal. He is to be married next month but I can't imagine him a married man or possessing any very deep affection for her. Collie came to see Jim after tea but he does not think he'll go to Knockroe. Likes Rosedale & the wages are better & time shorter. 10th. Tuesday. Jim poking around all day. We nearly had a quarrel after dinner talking over our affairs. I do wish the way was clearer before me. I must see Mr. Benbow next week & ask him if there's any chance of my becoming a teacher. It's no use our rushing away from here to nowhere. Arthur can't have us now that is certain. Jim doesn't want us - not both of us - & besides I don't want to live with them. We decided that it would be better to go into into[sic] a cheaper house ourselves & let Jim have this or another equally handy to the station so that when he brings Edie down if he should have to leave her in town she will be handy to the station & not far from us. I would rather study in a quiet place of our own - a home - for the time I need anyway. Saw Jim away. Feel all dumpy to-day but bit brightened by letter from H. He is going South & hopes I will be[2 words underlined] here. Thinks he'll be here at the end of May. If I go up to Edie at the beginning of May I won't be home till end of June. Must write & tell him not to hurry. Kitty McCarthy told me today she was going to Too-woomba to school on Saturday 11th. Wednesday. French this morning. Ma & I went down to Skyrings this afternoon but they were out. We had nice outing however. Lovely day. went into Young's & got K.M. a nice autograph album for keepsake. Went off to bed early. Mrs. Mellor wants us to go to the Coast with her to-morrow. 12th. Thursday. Left home at 7.30. walked up to S.B. Left Mrs. Mellor's about 1/4 past 8. We drove through town & then out. Got down to the Heads about 10. Had a most enjoyable day She spread her tent & we laid under [?most] all day. Left again at 4 for home. Got home at 10 to 6. I never enjoyed a day more. It was not too hot nor too cloudy. Our faces got burnt tho. Got cleaned up & tidied round for our visitor. Did not know whether he would come or not after my being so saucy to him on Monday but maybe it did him good. If he is having a bit of fun[6 words underlined] with me so am I with him[7 words underlined]. He came early & we had a nice evening. He promised me 50 stamps for any "chain" that Mrs. Reddan asked me to help her with. Was very - - - Il voulait beaucoup que il pouvait me baiser Mais Non! pas encore. I'm going to have some fun first. 13th. Friday. Busy. Lessons. Didn't go to practice. Had French exercises to write & a letter to Arthur. He was very desirous last night that I came out tonight but I said I thought not. 14th. Saturday. French this afternoon & to church to practise then down town. In Peat's. Mrs. P. told me that Joe Crabtree had gone on the ran - dau - at Gin Gin & had got the sack from Cochrane's. They had to fetch him home he didn't want to come. Will said they told him up there that he had been on the loose 2 or 3 times up there. Poor unfortunate fellow. I thought there was something weak about him. He broke his pledge at Xmas. Thought so too. 15th. Sunday. Church twice & S.S. My erstwhile youngman walked home with us from church again this morning & gave me 50 stamps. Came home with us again at night too. It rained heavily whilst we were in & we had nothing to put about us. He was very good & brought us his umbrella. A quite memorable evening for me. Après il me baisait deux fois. Je ne voulait pas l'empêcher. 16th. Monday. W. Mr. Noynes came to practice. He came again at night & we had music &c. & music & - - - - 17th. Tuesday. St Patrick's Day. All family up here for the day. Ivy & I went for a walk to the Gardens. The rest just went outside somewhere. Who should appear on the scene but "himself". He said something last night about coming. We roamed about there till 1/2 - 5 & then walked home together. Ivy was quite shocked at our behaviour. He came round again after tea. Mabel & Elsie stayed to sleep & we sang from about 7 till 1/2 past for them then had a confidential talk for about 1/2 an hour. He told me he thought I was quite a different sort from what he found me - I was always so standoffish & stiff he was afraid to tackle me. "If he had things would have been different." Reckoned he had a great influence over girls. They were generally very soft men could do what they liked with them. Called me a flirt for which I made him apologise after. Am afraid there's not much love in his case to his fiancée. Must see Mr. Benbow on Thursd 18th. Wednesday. French this morning. Waited for Skyring's this afternoon but they didn't come. Got a lecture. Had to explain our confidential conduct last night. Y. Committee meeting this afternoon Mrs. M. Carrie to[sic], & Miss Southey.

19th. Thursday. Practised. wrote French. About 1/2 - 4 went down to Ma at the church at W.C.T.U. From thence up to S.B. To Hussey's first then to Grace's for tea. Then nearly dusk went to Benbow's My "scheme" has been troubling me for some time so I made up my mind to go at once & see Mr. B. He seemed to think it highly possible & probable. Thinks I would not have to study long I might start next week. He did not think I would remain long in a prov. school. He will try & get me into Mr. Harrap's district. I was quite taken by surprise at his confidence in my success. Well it has come whether for good or not I can't say. I prayed that if it were God's will it might be made possible for me & if not there would be obstacles thrown in the way. Ma does not like it but what am I to do. He came just as we got home. I cotched it afterwards for letting him make so free with me but I can't help it. If he is free with me I shall be too with him; sept fois[2 words underlined]. Je versait beaucoup de larmes après coucher me 20th. Friday. Busy. Was going to look at another house near the gardens but it rained. Went to practice we stopped early & we two had a most confidential walk & talk afterwards. Nous nous promenades [...]. I talked to him like a sister & told him what Grace & Ma had said last night & he promised not to look my side the street in daytime. I told Ma I'd break off altogether if she liked. Don't know but what I will. Said again "If he had only known me[underlined] before. But then I mightn't have had him". Quoth I "I mightn't" 21st. Saturday. Showery all day. Sol W. sent P.O. notes for 12/- Says the railway man won't take the house. It is too big. Another man came on Wednesday to see about it. Perhaps he'll take it. Letter from Jim. enclosing £2. Ma & I went for walk up to see the house near Gardens. It is[underlined] a nice place. 6 rooms pretty garden & nice yard. Went down again to Russ's to see Simpson who lets it. He said it was 8/- & will let us have the key on Monday to look through. Must write to Jim about it. I think it's a very nice place & such conveniences to this poky place. Great Election Day. We just came in for the excitement. Glassey returned by 207. Quite romantic week this. 22nd. Sunday. Church twice & S.S. Clarrie & Ivy to tea. Met him going down. We three went for nice walk up as far as the house in Bourbon St. in the moonlight & then he came in for a while when we got home. 23rd. Monday. No work to-day. Ma & I went up this morning & got the keys of the house & had a look through it. It was dirty inside. Nice outside. But it is[underlined] far. Wrote to Jim telling him & asking his advice. Can't do anything till we get his answer. Mr. Benbow sent a note by Ivy saying I was to come & start on Wednesday night[underlined]. That almost finishes our house scheme. A terrible walk it - would be a fearful walk up to the school. My friend couldn't come tonight. His Pa & Ma are coming home 24th. Tuesday. 4. Lessons. 25th. Wednesday. Rubbed muself up a bit today. in general. Letter from Jim : Says we can do as we like but thinks the rent does not compensate for the distance. Told Simpson we decided not. Left here early to after tea to S.B. Met him in Peat's. Said he would come round to Benbow's & walk home with us but he didn't turn up till after we got home at 9.30. Got started with lessons at Benbow's. I've only [...] charge a guinea. Thinks I'll get all appointment soon. 26th. Thursday. Lessons & studies. Went down to Y meeting. Mrs. & Miss Skyring were up. They heard that W's engagement was broken off. Guess some funny tales have been going abroad. He turned up after all this evening while Mrs. Reddan was here & we had a nice evening. Lovely moonlight 27th. Friday. Busy. Out to practice to-night. Was kept there till 10 o'clock by Miss Southey & Mr. Mann. They spoilt our[underlined] walk home too. he & she nearly had a hand to hand fight over me. Nous faisions un adieux à l'abri. Il semble d'être très - fûché. que notre camaradie est bientôt fine. Moi centté. Je ne sais ce que je ferai. Il m'agûbé. Lovely moonlight clear & brilliant. & so warm night. Musical evening [...] Friday (Good) 28th. Saturday. French. Went down home at night. Out till 9.30. Mrs. Reddan came across us in the S. of. A. & informed us that Mrs. Lovebody or other had told her that Miss P. was going to be marry[sic] Mr. Young & Julia Knudson had said that the choir really thought that he was going to have me. What news. How people will gossip. Ma quite in a state. Studied good bit today. 29th. Sunday. Church twice & S-S. Mr. Eustace preached at night to large congregation. We lost our escort tonight. Je suis très-triste. C'est que le communicenient. Loveliest moonlight imaginable 30th. Monday. Up early this morning. Ma went off by the 1/4 to 11 train with all sorts of things to Jim - whole box-full. Studied all day. Waited for Ma at usual train-time but train came in but no Ma put in an appearance. Got a bit scared but supposed she had missed the train. It was too late to go up to S.B. so as it was moonlight I decided to stay alone. Settled myself down for the night when who should appear but his lordship. I wanted him to go away again but

he wouldn't go. So we entertained one another till 10. He has bought Capt. Owen's house. Oh my! What I have missed : Nous eînues un beau temps ensemble. Tout amoureuse. I went to bed in peace. 31st. Tuesday. Had good night. Didn't mind it. It was such a bright moonlight. Studied lot all day. Grace & children came up after tea. Ivy stayed with me & Mrs. Reddan came in at 1/2-8 & stayed till train-time when she sent Mr. R. down for Ma. We didn't go down at all. Ma had great experiences. Train sailed out while she & Jim were. talking together. She had to stay at the Hotel. Jim down in dumps again. He can't be well worrying always worrying - Down to post this afternoon 1st. April Wednesday. Lessons & French. Went up to Benbow's. Didn't get on well at all with my geography. did better with grammar. Came home tired. Eleven years today since we left Gladstone 2nd. Thursday. Lessons. My erstwhile young man came tonight. He is to be married on the 15th. Grand affair 3rd. Friday. Good Friday[2 words underlined]. Studied all morning. Was going down to church to practise & Mr. & Mrs. Ellison called to take me for a drive. we went out to Faulkner's (Woodlands) Had very nice drive. It did me a world of good. Miss Southey came in after tea to practise her solo. Mrs. Reddan & her friend went down to the "Musical Evening" with us. It went off very well. Much better than any of us thought Fair number there. He escorted us all home & we two got into disgrace by our behaviour on the way home 4th. Saturday. Busy day. Down town morning. Lesson & French after dinner. Down to church to practice. Studies at night. Sol Wanmer sent us £2. for iron he bought. Will just pay for Ma's teeth. Also letter from Edie. She expects me up for a long holiday before the event which they expect to take place in June. She has had a letter from Alice (cool one too) Poor me I've had none. Must be in disgrace. 5th. Sunday[bracketed with]Easter. Church twice & S.S. Our friend was at church twice too & popped in after we came home at night. Beautiful services today. Church ornamented with vases of flowers. Communion after church this morning. Great crowd at church tonight : Prov. Alliance men about 40 there but without them the place would have been full. 6th. Monday. Easter Monday Sports on. we went down to Skyring's this afternoon. took Ivy & Mabel. Started letter to Alf after we came home & went to bed at 1/4-7. didn't want any visitor tonight. Felt too tired. Told Skyrings. all about our plans. 7th. Tuesday. w. Lessons. Just before tea Russ's man called with note from Jack Dawson to say that they would be round after tea. They came & brought the Strachans & a young man called Smith. Champion cyclist I think. nice looking young man too He sang a few songs for us : a very nice voice & well-trained. Not strong but sweet & expressive. We had quite a concert of our own. 8th. Wednesday. Busy day. Studied as well as I could considering interruptions. Miss Crowther came to practise a song for the Social tonight. Of course we couldn't go on account of lessons. Then Mr. Noynes came & stayed good while. Raced up to Benbow's. Had good lesson. Got on better this time. Came home by way of the church & saw Mrs. Ellison. She wanted me to go up to tea tomorrow night as it is quarterly meeting but perhaps my young man may come & then Madame will have to give me my lesson at night. She has boarders again. 9th. Thursday. Edie's birthday : 26th. Studied &c, Mad. came over at night & gave me my lesson Sad event occurred last Monday night. The man that used to do my business in the N.S.W. Bank fell over the balcony of the Queen's Hotel & killed himself. It was not known how he did : Suppose he had taken too much & was sick over the railing of the balcony & overbalanced himself. His brother was to have been married today. Went down to Stephens yesterday & had my tooth stopped & paid him for Ma's teeth. Made me sea-sick this time. We had quite a confab together. Were rather glad to renew old acquaintance I think. My visitor came tonight & we had music & said Adieu [?panbly]. Wrote to Herbert today. 10th. Friday. Busy. went up to Ellison's to tea. went there at 1/2-4. Saw Miss Workman there She's not going to the wedding. T. is coming up here afterwards & she is going down with her. Had nice evening & learnt my smocking. Going to make my red blouse up. Practice. Very hot day quite summer. My escort was to come for me afterwards but he didn't turn up till I was nearly home Stayed some time after. Expressed regret encore de ne pas m'avoir connaître avent. Je te sentirai beaucoup. 11th. Saturday. Studied &c. Down town this morning & to practise. Didn't go to French. He came in again tonight & brought me his photo. Good one. Mrs. Reddan [?called in] too & stayed a good while. Don't know what she thought of things in general. Asked him to come to tea tomorrow evening. Nohre wiedersehn.

12th. Sunday. Church twice & S.S. My friend came up to tea. He had been to the S. School for me but I had left earlier. Had nice time. comme j'avais espéré. Comme je le manquercii! Il ne semble pa le sentir comme moi. mais vraiment les hommes ne senbent pas comme les femmes. "De connaitre d'estimer, d'annes et alors de separer est l'histoire de beaucoup de coeurs tendres." Tom Workman was to sleep at his house & be ready to leave with him in the morning so we saw nothing more of him after church. 13th. Monday. Didn't wash. Just studied &c. Jim came home by 1/4-5 train to go to Knockroe. He doesn't seem in a very good state of mind terribly depressed - now he has everything he wants he is not happy. Un jour est passe". J'ai demandé que le bon dieu me donnera de courage de endoureir cette penance. Jim doesn't think the affair can come off till end of June Raced down to chemists this morning to get things for Jim in time to go by train. Feel triste 14th. Tuesday. Studied all day mostly. Un faubre jour. Demain sera le faire 15th. Wednesday. Our[underlined] wedding-day. Suppose it all came off straight & right. French this morning. Studied all afternoon. Very windy day. Went to Benbow's at night. He wants me to apply at once for Rosedale. Have to enquire the names of the school committee there & send down an application to Brisbane as soon as possible. Don't feel bad after all. Don't care now it's over 16th. Thursday. Resting to-day. Feel tired. Finishing smocking my blouse : rather troublesome but managed to get it right somehow. Raced down town this morning after writing a few lines to Mr. Cann to send me the names of the committee men. Got Marsh to write to old Bob Hay too. didn't want to myself so ought to get an answer on Saturday. Fearfully windy & dusty 17th. Friday. Busy. Wrote to Duffy asking him for testimonial. Went to practice after going down town. Mrs. Peat told me the account of our wedding was in the Courier. Must go to S. of A. to-morrow night & see. Threatened rain but wanted to ask Mr. Ellison for his recommendation & then it's Choral Service Sunday night. Feel quite heureux today. Do hope I may get that school. It would be just the thing. 18th. Saturday. Wrote up to Mr. Benbow a rough draft of my Government letter to correct &c. Ivy came down again in the afternoon saying that he would have it ready by Monday. No answers from Rosedale nor Duffy. Can't make it out. Suppose I am to be disappointed as per usual. It's no use my hoping for anything. I never do get anything now I wish or hope for. Letter from Jim. He lives with Percy & the [?toffs] & sofar[sic] is treated quite nicely. Very glad. He had not behaved well before coming down on Monday I thought not from his looks & his breath. Do hope he does not mean to be like that after all his pressures. 19th. Sunday. Church time. Threatened & rained some. didn't go to S.S. Good congreg. at night. Choral Service. Feel all right to-day. Ras chier au soir. We saw the account of "our wedding" in the Star in S. of. A. last night. Great affair. 70 guests & silks &c, & valuable & numerous presents. Quite 'toffy'. Made me feel quite envious for a while 20th. Monday. w. Busy day. Threatened rain again. Skyrings didn't come after all. went out at night to Mr. Eustace's lecture on "The Southern Isles" Very good. Illustrated by maps & curios. Good many there too. Spoke to Mr. Curtis last night about finding out names of committee - 21st. Tuesday. Lessons. Studying. Wrote to Jim. & sent himparcel[sic]. Tuesday night coming from church Mr. C. happened to mention he was going to Rosedale next day so I thought I would ask him to do what he could for me up there. Told him everything. [?So he] went yesterday & will be back Thursday. Duffy sent me his testimonial yesterday & Mr. Ellison gave me his on Sunday. Mr. Benbow sent his this morning so I just wrote my application to-day & went down & posted it to-night after Mr. Reddan had been here finishing our "themes". 22nd. Wednesday. Studying. Mr. B. sent note by Grace this afternoon - not to come to-night as he was out. Miss Skyring came & Mrs. Christoe. Yesterday afternoon old Mrs. Close (White) came to see us & gave us all news. She says it is rumoured that the 3 eldest "Cousins" have an allot. of land & £100. Hope it's true but think not. Getting things sewed ready for me. Think I'll go up to Eunine next Monday week 23rd. Thursday. Lessons &c. After tea Mr. Curtis sent for me to come down & see him so we went. He has been very good. Went round & saw as many of the committee as he could. Especially the Sec. Postmaster Charles. They all say they will do what they

can for me & were going to call a meeting that night & bring my name up before the meeting. Miss Kees, daughter of schoolmaster here intends applying for it. Mr. Harrap (inspector) is trying to get it for her. But Mr. C. doesn't think she'll get it.She does not bear a very good name in some place she was at before so Mr. C. advised them not to have her. 24th. Friday. Went up early this morning & saw Mr. Benbow. He says I had better write & tell Mr. Charles to get the com. to nominate me & then that will be the principal thing. Came home tired. Letter from Jim wanting me to go to the Bank for him so I had another walk. Had to let the work go to-day. Wrote to Rosedale. Excursion down river in Lady Musgrave to-night in aid of church. Had bad sore throat yesterday & we gave up all idea of going. but might as well have gone as throat is better & it is a lovely night. 25th. Saturday. Busy day getting things done. Wrote to Edith yesterday telling her to expect me any time after next week. If I don't get Rosedale I'll just go straight up. Ivy down this morning. Says "We" are home. Good gracious our honeymoon was[underlined] short & sweet. 26th. Sunday. Church twice & S.S. Horrid windy day & I have cold in the head went up to Grace & J's for tea. Saw "us" at church to-night. Don't feel bad over it anyway. 27th. Monday. No washing this week. Getting my things all done up & making skirt (black) Mr. C. sent Fred in to-night with a note from Charles to himself. In it he says "The com. have applied for a single man - preferred on account of roughness & lack of accommodation but failing one have recommended Miss P. in preference to all others". Mr. C. says they can accommodate me well enough if they like. So that is all we can do now. Must trust to Providence for the rest. Expected Skyring's but they came not. Studied. 28th. Tuesday. Studying nearly all day. Nellie O. called. Says she heard I was going away next week so wanted to see me. I wrote to Eunine & 29th. Wednesday. Raining this afternoon. Studied till my head ached. Miss Reddan came in & [...] gave me & finished off a nice cord & tassel for my wrapper. Went up to Benbow's. Had good lesson. Rained there but lovely night coming home. 30th. Thursday. My application arrived this morning to filled in by me. Took it to Mr. B. before school this afternoon. On the way called in at Marsh's. He informed me he had another billet for me. Governess at Gibson's. Mr. Ellison had been asked to look out for - some one to suit & had thought to recommend me. But dear me! It's too late : I asked Mr. B. He said I could take it if I didn't get Rosedale but he felt sure I would. Came home very tired. Went early to bed. Had letter from Herbert too. He is supposed to be in Westwood today on his way down South. Where on earth will my letter go to now. He thinks I am leaving home today too. He says he's not staying in W. Once down in Brisbane he can come up & see me now & again. That's a pill. 1st. May Friday. Horrible day. About the worst I ever had in my life. Filled in my applic. & sent it to Mr. B. to correct by Ivy. Intended to send it & an application for Rosedale together. I went down to the church to practice. Mr. Ellison came. Ma little while afterwards. He is in a fearful way about my going to Rosedale. or prov. school teaching at all. Drew such a doleful picture of things. Poor Ma nearly in tears. Made me feel bad all over too. Dark side of everything. Says he believes Gibson's will take me & it would be splendid thing for me. Good gracious! Why didn't I know this before. It's too late now. However I went up to Nellie's for tea. Jack has been to Rosedale this week. He said first thing "Don't you go there. There's no place for you to stay except McCann's den." "Charles' wife won't take anyone in flatly refuses" Made me feel worse. Mr. Benbow was supposed to be at practice at Pres. Church so we called for Ma & went down there but found that he wouldn't be there till 8.30. so went over to our own. Had confab with Mr. C. & Mr. M. again. Went over at 8.30. but he wasn't there Back to church again & then over again & caught him just going home. He couldn't help laughing over the pickle I had got into. I must just send on my applic. now & say nothing about Rosedale. If I should get the ap. must refuse it. Perhaps Gibson's won't want anyone after all. Then I go for my holidays 2nd. Saturday. Feel quite queer today after all my excitement yesterday. Went down & posted my thing.