(seq. 37)

a certain thing no more & no less & May saw that it required
a great effort for him to speak at all at any rate in that way. She
did not know what reply to make but at length she said slowly & in a
way quite unlike her usual rapid fluent speech I don't know what to
say to you except that you must believe I appreciate do understand
how hard it must have been for you to tell me this and --why-- you
have told it. I must feel that if any thing now it would be impossible I don't think
I care for you in that way though I shall always have for you
the strongest respect & gratitude & friendship. In justice to
myself I must make what little excuse I can for what I did the
other night. I was unusually unhappy & wanted to forget & I thought
I would do what other girls do once. I can't understand why I
let you kiss me of course I might have prevented it but in some
way it seemed as though I could not. If you knew how bitterly
I have regretted it you would not think the less of me for it.
Don't speak like that May Harry interrupted you can never be
anything but the most perfect woman in the world to me. You
are too kind she said rising & I cannot repay you but I can
be just & I will. We must forget all this [rather?] to-day but for
I do not love you though if anything else [none?] had been possible
I might have learned to love you Harry. She said it hesitatingly
she had not meant to admit so much but For a second she
saw that she had made a mistake but it was too late. But
Darling he said quickly for don't misunderstand me it was not of I didn't mean
to have you think it was utterly impossible if you cared for me a little
I only wanted you to know how little I had how little I am but if you will be