25¢ THIS IS
MY YOUR GEEK WEEKLY [image of false teeth] WITH CARDS ROCK-N-ROLL MOVIN' BLUES GEEK REVOLUTION ROSTER CHICAGO TRAVEL STORY HANDY ADDRESSES MUSIC & SHIT - AND INTERVIEWS [scratched out] - maybe next time [image of crabs] WRITE YOUR NAME HERE ______________________________ [image of Saturn] VOL. #1 FALL 1994 NO. 1
Ok, so I've been saying I was gonna do this for a few months now and here I am doing it, I can't fucking believe it! I am soooo proud!
I really hope some people like what I'm doin' here, cuz I know how graet it is to just fall in love with someone's zine. Please write me letters and send shit to trade cuz I just recently moved and realized how much shit I own and if you write me maybe I'll send you some of it. I love havin' cool shit, but maybe I oughtta do a little tradin' around, you know kinda circulate some shit...
Anyway, I just moved and I'm livin' with this other girl named Jennifer, so it's gonna get kinda confusing, I think. It's a big change livin' in a little, nice wood house really close to the Drag, with a GIRL instead of being like the only girl in a punk house with all these boys everywhere. It's not that I don't dig boys or anything, it's just crazy to live with 'em, especially the ones I was livin, with.
So, I expect lots of visitors, bein' so centrally located and all, and I also expect lots of mail!!
Just send me some stamps or some cool shit or a zine or some money or something if you want another copy of this.
[image of boy and girl farming]
THE GREAT ROCK-N ROLL MASSACRE '94
It all started with the Motards/Drags/Fells show at Electric Lounge on 19 August. I got this crazy start and ended up going to the show with my now-roommate. When I showed up, Susan was there which was really weird cuz I took her to the bus station two days earlier and I didn't expect to see her again for a month or two. It turned out that she met up with this chick in Houston during her layover and ended up staying for a couple of days and spending all her money or something and coming right back home. So blah, blah, the show was great, the Motards were rowdy-imagine! and the Drags blew me away- I'd never heard/seen them before (partly cuz they're from Arizona)- and, of course the Fells were just beautiful. The only weird thing that happened was that CJ from the Drags jumped on me and then gave me a 7". Oh, and people kept asking Susan if we were sisters, a thing that hasn,t happened to us in a long time.
But then, on Sunday night, after being denied Susan's mom's car (a really plush Jeep-Trooper thing with a CD player and AC and all), we headed for San Antonio in my fucked up '73 Superbeetle, Ruth. Now, when I got Ruth a few years ago, I would drive her to Houston a lot to go visit my mommie, but she I haven't dared to take her out on the open road in some time. She performed beautifully! She really came through for me.
And after tons of confusion and a brick plate special from a Furr's Cafeteria in San Marcos, we got to Taco Land who had said over the phone that the Inhalants/Drags/Fells show was indeed happening there ..... 2
Well the show wasn't happening there when we arrived, nor was it planned. So we called Wacky's and they said that the show was going to be there. But, when we got there, no one was there and the guy, presumably Wacky himself, said he hadn't heard from any of the bands since Wednesday. "But," he said, "we got dollar Shiner Bocks tonight." So we thought we'd take a break before driving home, and luckily, the bands showed up.
Turned out there were only a few locals there and they were extremely questionable-not punk or rock. The dollar beer soon lubricated the mostly Austin crowd and the show got off to a great start. I already loved watching the Inhalants and now they've got Dana ex-Hormone on drums so they're doublecool. Then the Drags got on stage and kicked ass and this time CJ just threw a 7" at me. Then it all fell apart- no pun needed- and the Fells fucking went to hell in front of us all. It was insane nad by the end no one was playing their own instruments or anything and people were getting on the stage and Heath was under a ladder in back of the stage nursing wounds, I suppose and everyone was drunk and CJ was on stage and people were screaming and hitting things and some guy kept falling on me no matter where I moved.
And through it all two little Mexican boys kept trying to sell people roses for 2 bucks each and everytime they did you could see the person think "Hmmm, that's two beers....nah"
Afterward someone put on that new Johnny Cash record which sounded really weird after what had just happened, but it was better than that fucking Bjork record that I keep fucking hearing everywhere I go even before the show that night. And everybody kinda sat around and looked stunned. And the bar ran out of beer.
CHEPPO TRIBUTE PAGE
Bitch Bitch Bitch
1. I'm pissed that my mom and brother live in Chicago now and that so many of my friends live far away. 2. I'm pissed that rent and shit is so high in this town. 3. I'm pissed that there weren't any Whore-o-Scopes or a Dear Fag Hag column in the last Issue of the Fag Rag. 4. I'm pissed that there aren't any really good clubs in this town. 5. I'm pissed that I can't afford any new records right now. 6. I'm pissed the Grifters haven't been here again sooner, like, now, goddamnit! -BUT 1. I'm happy that there are so many new, good local bands right now! We had quite a drought there for a while. 2. I'm glad that my new roommate has three newts. When I asked what their names were, she said Jonie and Chachie. Hello- there are three of them, but only two names- I dunno maybe she should lay off the pot for a while. 3. I'm glad my bestest friend Susan is back and giving me her TV and VCR. 4. I'm glad I can walk to Sound Ex now from my house. 5. And last of all, sweet reader, I am so, so happy that you are reading my humble piece of writing.
[photo triptych of young boy making faces]