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308 LIFE AND TIMES OF FREDERICK DOUGLASS

Eager to know if my kinsfolk still lived, and what was their condition, I
made my way to the office of Mr. Sears, found him in, and handed him the
note I had received from Mr. Needles, and asked him to be so kind as to read
it and tell me if the facts were as there stated. After reading the note, he said
it was true, but he must decline any conversation with me, since not to do so
would be a sacrifice to the feelings of his father-in-law. I deeply regretted his
decision, and spoke of my long separation from my relations, and appealed
to him to give me some information concerning them. I saw that my words
were not without their effect. Presently he said, "You publish a newspaper, I
believe?" "I do," I said, "but if that is your objection to speaking with me,
no word shall go into its columns of our conversation." To make a long story
short, we had then quite a long conversation, during which Mr. Sears said
that in my "Narrative" I had done his father-in-law injustice, for he was
really a kind-hearted man, and a good master. I replied that there must be two
sides to the relation of master and slave, and what was deemed kind and just
to the one was the opposite to the other. Mr. Sears was not disposed to be
unreasonable, and the longer we talked the nearer we came together. I finally
asked permission to see Mrs. Sears, the little girl of seven or eight years
when I left the eastern shore of Maryland. This request was a little too much
for him at first, and he put me off by saying that she was a mere child when
I last saw her, and she was now the mother of a large family of children, and
I would not know her. He could tell me everything about my people as well
as she. I pressed my suit, however, insisting that I could select Miss Amanda
out of a thousand other ladies, my recollection of her was so perfect, and
begged him to test my memory at this point. After much parley of this nature,
he at length consented to my wishes, giving me the number of his house and
name of street, with permission to call at three o'clock P.M. on the next day.
I left him delighted, and prompt to the hour was ready for my visit. I dressed
myself in my best, and hired the finest carriage I could get to take me, partly
because of the distance, and partly to make the contrast between the slave
and the free man as striking as possible. Mr. Sears had been equally thoughtful.
He had invited to his house a number of friends to witness the meeting
between Mrs. Sears and myself.

I was somewhat disconcerted when I was ushered into the large parlors
occupied by about thirty ladies and gentlemen, to all of whom I was a perfect
stranger. I saw the design to test my memory by making it difficult for me to
guess who of the company was "Miss Amanda." In her girlhood she was
small and slender, and hence a thin and delicately formed lady was seated in
a rocking chair near the center of the room with a little girl by her side. The